When Life Happens

• Old habits reappear
• Life becomes about reacting instead of acting
• Activities that bring us pleasure drop on our list of priorities
• Survival begins to trump living fully

That is what has happened to me.  I have been dealing with a health crisis due to an injury. 

• I have fallen into the "I'll be happy...when" trap
• I have been letting my emotions be controlled by the ups and downs of dealing with insurance companies and all of the physicians
• I have all but stopped writing
• I anxiously count the days and weeks instead of living in the moment

How do we let ourselves do this so easily? 

I think it is easy for me because I have expectations of how life "should" be.  Occasionally during these times, I am reminded that it is my expectations that set the trap.  Instead of being frustrated by external drivers, I am working on embracing each beautiful moment knowing that what I am looking for is not external.  It is inside my heart and my soul and has indeed always been.